Prologue.

Saturday, August 22, 2009

I have been consistently blogging since sophomore year—although constantly accompanied by the occasional hiatuses. I’m a sophomore in college now. And I realized I wanted to write again.

For various reasons, I’ve never actually stuck with any of my previous blogs and ended up neglecting it. And then days, weeks, months passed by, my blog untouched. On the latter days of my former blogging days, writing seemed like a chore. It felt so tedious. It felt like a struggle to string my train of thoughts together and put everything down on paper—or in my case on a computer. I’ve lost my drive for writing. And then losing an appetite to blog altogether, I deleted my blog.

A few years later—three and a half, to be approximate—I craved for that passion to write again. This time I want it to be different. Now that I knew what I really wanted, I decided to take another shot at writing. Not for the comments, not for the readers, and definitely not for show. But this time, to nurture what I have learned and see where it leads me. It’s a genuine appetite for learning this time. I REALLY want to excel in this department! Writing, above all, is something I can honestly say I love. While being a musician and an artist is truly appealing to me, they do not hold that kind of passion that writing grasped—even with sufficient skills and talents bestowed upon me. Being a writer is something I can see myself without being delusional.

Deleting my former blog was a mistake I completely regret. It would have been an accomplishment seeing your earlier works transit to what they’ve become. It’s always nice to have something to look back on and witness how much you have grown. Well, I have to start with a new, clean slate—have to start somewhere. And it’s a good thing… right? I shall refer to this as my Journal my blog, no longer. Since, technically, it is just that its digital. The word blog just gave the impression of superficial-ness. Well, at least for me they do. And I refuse to believe that my writings are shallow(At least, I'm trying to).

I have no intention of revealing my identity. Clichéd and corny as it may deliver but I intend this to be private. I chose this journal to be mounded by clouds of anonymity, separating me from… me—if you know what I’m saying. This will be my safe refuge. It’ll shelter my heart and soul. It’s a place I wish I would grow in. And I don’t think I’m capable of growing while I'm standing on a pedestal with everyone’s eyes on me.

This, I would like to believe, as another step forward. I might not be able to stick up to this journal again, I might fail and I might not. I don't know. Let's see where and how far this will take me.

*****
Credits to go:
Image: Kai Z Feng

0 comments:

Post a Comment

powered by Blogger | WordPress by Newwpthemes | Converted by BloggerTheme